This post was originally published on May 3, 2022.
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I think I’ve finally had a breakthrough. It may be a case of still breaking through but I’m pretty sure I’ve turned a corner.
And for that, I am grateful.
You see, I’ve missed the space I’ve built here. This seasonal change I’ve had took me a minute to adjust. I think I’m finally getting there, though!
Because, well, it’s hard when it’s a shared living space. I suppose everyone finds challenges and difficulties in sharing living spaces. Whether it’s with a spouse and/or the family you made together, or roommates, or blended or multi-generational families, there’s bound to be differences of opinions.
Maybe that’s why some people go the extreme route and become hermits. A recluse sounds so romantic sometimes, don’t you think?
In practical terms, though, we are social beings and made for community and relationship. And, really, there are so many blessings to be found in the messiness of daily life and domestic annoyances.
Which (cue the fanfare) brings me to my topic for this month’s Gathering post!
But what, exactly, does hospitality mean?
Is it entertaining? Is hospitality hosting a dazzling event? Is it preparing and presenting delicious delicacies on fine china and with high-thread count linen? Is hospitality having millions of twinkle lights strung around your backyard with paths to hidden seating destinations where you can enjoy the breeze and atmosphere and a fun conversation?
Is hospitality providing a goodies basket in the spare bedroom and bath for out of town guests? Is hospitality even having a spare bedroom just for out of town friends and family when they come to stay for a night or a while?
Because what if you don’t have an extra bedroom to use for that purpose? Or what if you don’t have the resources, either time or money, to create a secret garden in your backyard for an epic midsummer night’s soiree? Or what if you’re a horrible cook who burns everything and ends up with blue soup for your well-intentioned dinner party? Do you need to have a dinner party in order to practice hospitality? Wait, I don’t even own a dining table!
Wow, that unraveled into a mess fast!
Which is why hospitality is so much more than being the perfect hostess or having the best home that’s big enough or clean enough. Hospitality is about your heart and how you want others to feel in your home. Hospitality has more to do with inviting others into your space and wanting them to be welcomed and feel like they are free to be themselves.
Even if you lived in a ramshackle abode, but the people who came to visit with you felt seen and heard and loved, that carries more substance than if you lived in a glittering palace where your guests could easily feel small and lost.
So what are some ways to practice hospitality with where we currently are in life and what we can tap into as our current resources?
We can love others. We can invite a hurting friend over and listen. We can recognize someone from our community who might feel like they’re on the outside looking in during their current season of life and invite them over for a small gathering you may be having or just to get to know them over tea and snacks. Remembering that it’s more about caring and loving others than your performance will go a long way.
We can keep it simple. Showing hospitality can be as simple as sharing a meal, ordering delivery, or offering a soft place to spend the night, even if it is just the sofa!
We can keep it authentic. Even if you’re not an uber hostess or feel like you’ve got fancy things. Even if you believe your home is humble by the Instagram squares standards, you can invite, you can give, you can listen, you can laugh, you can cry with, you can offer wisdom, you can share.
So, even if your presentation looks more like a block of cheese and Ritz crackers than the most perfectly coiffed charcuterie board, go with it. The truest form of beauty, the kind with substance you want to engage with, comes from within anyway. And it’s the hospitality that begins from within that will impact to the deepest part.
